How to Write Your Wedding Vows

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Writing wedding vows is typically one of the most stressful parts of wedding planning for couples. Just writing a letter to a loved one can be intimidating! Capturing how you feel?not to mention articulating these deep feelings without sounding clich?d or corny?can be incredibly tough. Not to mention, there’s the pressure of delivering those words to your loved one with all your friends and family present. The tougher the process, however, the more satisfying the results often are. Here are a few tips to get you going.

A Starting Point

For many of us, any time we sit down to write a letter, we feel a little bit like the orcs from Lord of the Rings when the sun rises?completely frozen. Our advice? Give yourself plenty of time to sculpt these words, to get the tone down, to choose the best joke or anecdote, and to smooth everything over once you?ve got the content down.

Even if you’re anxious or feel strange writing these out a month, or months, before the ceremony, you will thank yourself later. Beginning the process of creating your wedding vows long before you feel pressure can help you write vows that feel most like you. And knowing you have them composed, besides scoring you major points with your significant other, will give you some extra peace of mind as the big day approaches.

“But I work well under pressure. Plus, I want to keep the vows simple.”

We’d argue that the best way to keep your vows concise and true to your personality is creating them without any pressure. Try jotting down a draft of your vows at least a month before the ceremony, so that you can get your thoughts on paper, let them sit awhile until you have fresh eyes again, and follow through with or hone these initial thoughts.

“Flowery, complicated vows aren’t for me. I’ll write a few notes down, but I want to speak from the heart, not read off a notecard.”

If you’re a talented public speaker or part of a local improv guild, then be our guest. Otherwise, we find that the people who tend to ramble during vows are the ones who haven’t written their speeches out or practiced much.